Good News...No!...Great News!

Ahhhhhhh! This post has taken me a few hours to write, because I had to calm down and compose myself, because it was something that I wasn't expecting...at all! I'll try to get right to it, but excuse me if I start to ramble a bit, because I'm still not quite sure if I have my thoughts all the way together! Anyway, you all know (well, if you're reading this and I know you...you know) that Yuta, his mom and dad all come to visit 2 times a year. It's usually once from August to September and again from December to January. Yuta left earlier this year, because he had planned to visit the host family we stayed with when we did a year abroad in Spain for university, but his parents stayed here with me, because they are sweet like that.

First part of good news: My mom convinced Yuta's dad to leave his wife here when he returns to Japan at the end of this week. I don't know how she pulled that off, because he can't stand being away from her. They are the sweetest couple I know :)...that brings me to....

Second part of good news: Did you really think that Yuta's dad was going to leave his wife here from September until December without seeing her? No wayyyy....Yuta and his dad are coming back at the end of October and they decided to stay from October 30th until the end of January at which time they will be leaving Yuta here until the beginning of March.  How can they stay away from work that long? Well that brings me to....

Third part of good news: Yuta's dad owns a bank and he presented the idea to his partner that they should open a branch here, and it turns out that my parents have been keeping a huge secret from me, because they have closed a deal on a space and everything is close to being complete! I was wondering why he was pushing Yuta to take all these business classes and accounting seminars and it turns out that Yuta and Eito (the business partners son) will be taking turns in overseeing the bank 6 months at a time...cool thing about Eito....he's dating Katsumi....part of my "Japanese trifecta-Emiko, Miyako and Katsumi" my baby girlssss. So, during the months that Eito is here, Katsumi is going to come once a month!

I don't think anyone can comprehend any of this right now and I'm not sure if I can either, but one thing that I do know is that I'm so incredibly happy. This will give me time to explore my relationship and figure out if I want to take the next step. Well, I'm going to stop now, because I only intended for this blog post to be like 10 lines long! OOPS! LOL

Until next time~

Happy...

I haven't made a post in a few days, so I thought that I should drop a few words here. I've been so happy these last few days. I've been reconnecting with my friends, going out more and having a life. I brought up the subject to my parents about moving, they seem sad but happy about it. I haven't made a decision yet, but the more I think about it...the happier I get. Have you ever had the feeling that your life is supposed to be so much more? I'm having that feeling lately. I also have the feeling that wherever I move, i'm going to be successful. I've just been feeling good! 

I had a skype date with Yuta's mom for our weekly Jersey Shore date. I'm so surprised she likes that show, but she loves it. We even got Yuta to watch it. He made smart ass, jerk-like comments about it, but he was a good sport about it. That's a great quality in a person. Someone who will spend  time with you even when it's something that they might not enjoy. Well, I'll leave it here. I just wanted to make a random post. lol

Until next time~

Sierra

Friday...Saturday...

This has been a roller-coaster weekend for me so far. I was doing great during most of last week, but late on Friday something happened. Something that knocked me off of balance, I don't know how I let these thoughts get in, but sometimes they slip through the cracks. I don't wish bad luck on anyone, but sometimes these overwhelming thoughts and feelings...scare me, because for a few seconds..for a few minutes, i wish that something horrible would happen to him, or at least I'd like for him to feel even a fraction of the pain that i've been dealing with. That's not the way that I'm supposed to live...those are not the types of thoughts a God fearing person should have. I need to figure out a way to get these feelings of bitterness and resentment out of my heart, because with those two emotions there, i'll never be able to move on, and I realize that. What bothers me the most though is the fact that when I get over it, when I cleanse my soul, when I forget...he comes back and inflicts more pain, and then I'm back to where I started. How do you close the door forever? That's something that I'm figuring out day by day. So, Friday was pretty bad for me, but sometimes all you need is a good cry, and I felt a lot better after I cried my frustrations out. The sun always shines in the morning...right?

Saturday was amazing. I woke up with a new determination to go out get some fresh air and treat myself to a day of doing anything and everything that I wanted to do. I also needed mommy time, because that always makes me feel better. I woke up at 7am and went to get my hair done, because what better way to start off the day than with excellent hair?!? LOL....I finished that and decided to stop by my parents house. My mom was on her way grocery shopping with my brother so I decided to go with her, before my lunch date. I spent a lot of money, but it was good spending some time with them. My lunch date went well too, I enjoy dating and keeping in touch with guys that actually know how to treat a lady. I'm not saying that it's going to go anywhere further, but it's good to date every once in awhile ^^. Saturday night was really good too. I went over to my aunt's house and me and my cousin ordered pizza and we watched Paranormal Activity 1, 2 and 3. I was a little freaked out leaving her house at 1am, but that's just my over active imagination. LOL.

Anyway, I guess that's it. The lesson here is...don't stop moving, even if you slip up one day. Put it behind you and go towards tomorrow with the determination that "today is going to be a better day" Do that and you'll never fail at anything you want to accomplish~

Until next time~

Sierra

Are You...Feeling Lighter?

So I've been on this quest since after the holidays to lose the weight that I gained due to Thanksgiving and Christmas, and I've been doing really good. I've actually lost more than what I gained over the holidays, and I'm going to see how much further I can go. In 27 days I lost 5kg (11 lbs), it feels good. I haven't put on my pointe shoes in awhile since my broken toes were healing, so I know that the minute I start practicing next month, it's going to hurt. It's a pain trying to recondition your feet to work how you want them to! LOL....According to my doctor a safe weight for me based on my height would be between 105 lbs(47kg) and 110 lbs (49kg). Now, I don't know if I'll ever get there, because I've never been that thin. The least that I've ever weighed was 130 lbs (59kg) which looked good based on my figure. I don't want to be stick skinny thin, because I'll probably look sick, and plus when you lose all that weight it starts to look unnatural. I like having a little bit of shape. lol. Well,  that's about it for my happy post! I'm feeling good today and hopefully that lasts throughout the week. I'm feeling lighter already!

Until Next Time,
Sierra~

Are You...Saying "Happy New Year"?

First blog post of 2012! Woot! I hope whoever is reading this has a Happy New Year and I hope 2012 brings light, love and joy into your life! That is what i'm claiming for myself! This year MUST be better than last year. If you throw out positive, you'll get positive in return!  I'm grateful for my family and friends for pulling me through this year and not allowing me to give up...no matter how much I wanted too. I don't live my life for me, I live my life for the people that I love, because in a sense, I value them more than I value myself. Thank you for making me believe that I deserve to be happy and that i'm loved!

Mommy #1: Thanks for being the coolest mom around. We share so much of the same things in common and I'm truly blessed that I was brought into this world as your daughter! Thanks for only wanting the best for me and helping me in my search for happiness!

Mommy #2: Although I was not born as your daughter, you are so very important to me. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for giving birth to the one friend who gets me like no one else does. The one friend that I know would never leave me. Yuta is a lucky guy...lucky that he has such a strong mother! I love you! Thanks for always telling me how it is...even when I don't want to hear it.

Daddy #1: I love you! There is  no one else like you! Thank you for being so supportive in everything that I do. You have never once told me my dreams were too big or too small. Anything I wanted to do you were always right behind me and ready to catch me if i fell. Thank you so much for that. There is no amount of money in the world to repay you for being such a strong backbone and support to me. Remember...I'll always make you proud!

Daddy #2: The funniest man I know. The most caring human being there is....that is how I would describe you. I know that you are always just one phone call away when I need to talk to you. I miss how it used to be when you were here all the time, but I know that you do what you can and I love you for it. Thank you for taking the time, money and energy to care for me like you do, because I know that you don't have too. You mean so very much to me, and I hope you never forget that.

Brother #1: There isn't much to say other than...thanks for being my brother. Although we might not always get along, I know that you are just doing what little brothers do....getting on my nerves! I love you and I know that if I ever needed anything you'd never hesitate to help! Love you!

Brother #2: My baby bro! We get along just fine right now, and I hope that it can always stay that way. I love you and you know that I'll always be here for you no matter what happens!

Yuta...my bestest! : Yuta..Yuta..Yuta..what can I say that I haven't already told you. You know just what you mean to me so i'm not going to lay it out on here. Just know that the decision that I made recently is turning out to be the best thing i've ever done in my whole life. Thank you and I love you MORE THAN ALL THE WORDS IN ALL THE BOOKS! (LOL)

Miya, Kat, Emi: You girls are my strength! Each of you bring a different kind of strength into my life, and if one of you were missing, I surely would not survive. I wish we lived closer! I didn't know that I could have friends that completed me as much as you girls do. 2012 means new things for us and I'm excited to see what Japan has to offer! I'll see you girls soon. Thanks for coming and making my house feel like a home! Love you!

That is all for now....I still need to make another post with the pictures from the last 2 weekends, but since this is dedicated to friends, family and the new year, I'll save that post for next time!  I love you all, and here's to an amazing New Year for ALL of us!

Sierra~

Are You...Keeping Secrets?

I am....well, it's not really a secret. Emi, Kat, Miya and the other person involved knows what it is, but...how should I put this....we're keeping a secret from our parents. It's not a bad secret but we don't want to disappoint them so we thought that it would be better this way. I'm being vague for a reason....I'm not ready to write the words out completely. So i'll dance around and get as close to what i'm trying to say as possible. I have some new responsibilities and so does the other person. We are going to try our best. That is the one thing about us...we are very determined and stubborn. If we say that we are going to do something to the end, then we try our best to fulfill that promise. The other person also has some new responsibilities, but i'm almost certain that this person will completely surpass my expectations because this person already does such a great job. I thought that I would feel a bigger change in the atmosphere or something, but actually everything feels oddly....normal. It's kind of scary and it makes me wonder how it must have looked before this. LOL....anyway, I'm going out for the night, but wanted to write something while i'm waiting for someone to finish getting ready so that I can finally get dressed! Later~